Just when we think we have all the answers, the question changes! I am still thinking about God, and marriage and how the two work together.
What if marriage really isn’t about you and your spouse as much as it is about you and God?
Maybe we have been thinking about this marriage thing in the wrong way all along, (hence the huge divorce rate). Maybe God uses marriage to make us both happy and holy and we just forget about the holy part.
How often do we say about our spouse, he or she is my soul mate, he or she makes my life complete? Maybe God wants to be the one to complete us and He never intended our marriage partner to be the one we look to for that particular fulfillment? Isn’t that really just idolatry? I know it is strange to think of our spouse that way, but it seems to me that if we let God complete us, the rest of marriage would fall into place more easily. I think that maybe our fulfillment and reason for being should be God and not our spouse and in turn, that would make us a far better partner in our marriage.
What’s more, if we really are looking to our spouses to be our God, how are they ever going to live up to that? There is no way they can; if we are looking to our spouses to be our God, we are setting our marriage up to fail.
Maybe just maybe, God guides us into marriage to help us on our journey to eternal existence with Him?
I say this because I am trying to reason this out; if happiness was the goal in marriage we would do as millions of other couples do, get a divorce as soon as happiness seems to fade into the mundaneness of real life. Or what about being in marriage only for what we receive, primarily love and attention, divorce would soon be imminent because as humans our attention span is limited at best and we are a pretty selfish bunch. But when you stop to think about it, isn’t that what is happening in the world? The divorce rate is astonishing and it could just be because we have our thoughts on ourselves and not what God intends our marriage to be.
I think that when trouble comes, and it will, we need to put on our grown up panties, suck it up and jump on the road to finding eternal happiness, jump on the road that leads to life with the only one who can give us complete wholeness, purpose and eternal life. If husbands and wives have a common destination the journey can’t help but be a whole lot easier.
I know I have written about this before but it is not an easy concept for me. Apparently I have to get myself out of the way, put my spouse in the correct place in my life and put God in the place where He belongs. I am quick to admit to say that marriage works best when God is involved but I think maybe I had the order wrong before, God should be in the top spot. There is no brighter beacon , there is no greater comfort, there is no better way to complete a marriage than to look to God to do it.